The Knife’s new album came out today. Early reviews are in — and I cannot understand why people are liking this album. 2 good tracks off the whole thing tops. With 19 minute sfx songs, too. Anyways, Andrew Brandt took to listening through the entire album and writing his thoughts down on each track. Listen to the album (if you can) and read through his ramblings!
song 1: A tooth for an eye – just smilling.. what am i listening to… mk mk ok… this is long but not bad… i just imagine them hitting random keys on a noise maker in some kind of rhythm. also imagine them in a studio in front of the mic making that ticking/clocking sound with their tongues…(and not with a wood block).
song 2: full of fire – beginning is already better… that’s good… ok this person is singing weird… these are terrible lyrics…. gotten used to it… nope… person still sounds weird… oh… what is this? this is awful… I really want to skip…. I want to skip…. oh it got better for a second… nope…. this is terrible… my god i’m not even half way done there is still 5 minutes left in this song… ughhhh i want to skip this song so bad this is awful… just noises… really just more noise… it just continues like this? only a minute left…. this is their single? done thank you god
song 3: a cherry on top: gha-gha-ghost! oh god this song is also over 8 minutes. “uuhh just fade noises in and out for a minute… then follow it up with some loud ring… a screen door opening…” this is basically the the video from the ring in audio form. i imagine that this will never be a song. screen door opening again, they’re back! 4 minutes in… some kind of rhythm… that’s drowning out… and… nope… lyrics… terrible terrible lyrics… just naming random things in sight. cream….. mk i get it. they do drugs, want people to do drugs and listen to this… shit… i get it… fades out. done.
song 4: without you my life would….: starts better. got a real beat… sounds a little bit like sounds of animals fighting… but obviously worse… some of this is good. like the faster singing lady that has i guess asian influence… until she yells. EVERYONE BLOW INTO YOUR RECORDERS NOW!!! HOOOOOLLLLDDDD ITTTT! HOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLDDDDDDD HOOOOOOLLLLLLLDDDDD. they got something here at the end with just the beat. could make this into a REAL song (loud enough for them to hear).
song 5: wrap your arms around me: drums in a big empty hall, science noises. now real noises. hahaha imagine some hippy waving their arms around with some drum sticks and accidentally breaking a window. the lyrical melody sounds very familiar… would probably have to listen to a lot of music to pick it out though. how long is this song? 4:36 mk, not bad. more than half way through. hippy person broke that glass again. this wasn’t terrible.
song 6: crake: starts with more noises, about to say i’m getting really impatient, thank god this song is only 55 seconds.
song 7: old dreams waiting to be realized: silence. best song yet. a lone note held …. potential… oh my god 19 minutes…. if this isn’t terrapin station i’m done. cat walking on a piano… silence again. by far their best song, reminiscent of John Cage. Accurately guessed over 7 minutes in, in my head. i’m pretty good with time. really tempted to skip this song. that random horn toot made me laugh a bit. 13:30 seconds here, i’ve pretty much gone into the Alternate Universe from ren and stimpy…. *pauses to pee* // *back* i wish i saw them play this song live…. just…. god.. come on… i imagine that this sound is them having a sword fight with sticks… counting down the seconds…. best… song…..ever…. would love to be in a room with a bunch of pretentious “music” people who think this is good so I could just look them in the eye and know they were faking it.
song 8: raging lung – for some reason is not available on spotify. thank god. or maybe that is the song in itself, not a song just a title….
song 9: networking. hmm sounds… in a repetitive manner, could be considered a beat… still going… so far this cd has been the definition of insanity. if i was some place that forced me to listen to this i would attack. Attack! i’m so angry it’s uncomfortable. just please end. 2 minutes left…. again best part was the end.
song 10: Oryx. Starts immediately with more noise. thank god only 37 seconds. pretty much 32 seconds, last 5 are nothing.
song 11: stay out here: oh god. 10:42 seconds… can’t even oh? what’s this beat…. ok ok ok… ah yes introduced something else, also in rhythm. some new, ruining it of course… but still good enough to continue on. weird whispered singing. haha man i can’t imagine someone singing like this… well i can, i guess. but someone that has no self respect… stupid lyrics, but overall not the worst song (see 2 through 10). ah three minutes left… time to fade in and out with noises. the audience loves this! ah getting stripped down back to the beat. nice. ah someone… making sounds…like an idiot. anyone can do this. ending is the best part, again. NEXT!
song 12: fracking fuild injection. what an incredibly hip title. yeeaa just more noises. bullshit. this is terrible. i’m skipping ahead fuck this. jumped to 3, didn’t sound any better, jumped to 4:45 sounds like a scary movie, jumped to 6:30 same thing… at the end, just obnoxious ringing… this is terrible.
song 13: ready to lose: normal beat. some kind of normal song coming together here. awful lyrics…. or whatever. something that resembles music… my extreme anger is subsiding…. ok! got thought that pretty easily. could definitely be the best song on the cd.