NFL 2009: Week 15 Predictions

17 Dec

Don’t call it a come back Hoi Polloi! Andrew, who after the first week was in last place, has climbed to the top after going a ridiculous 14 and 2. Genesis rebounded as well and went 11 and 5. Greg is disappointed like Randy Moss after having another 9-7 week. In case you haven’t been tallying the cumulative scores yourself, Andrew is now the current leader with 44 correct and 20 wrong. Genesis is keeping it close at 42 and 22 and Greg is 39 and 25.

Week 15 brings the first Saturday game of the season, so let’s get to it…

Thursday, Dec. 17 8:20 PM:

Indianapolis Colts AT Jacksonville Jaguars – Regardless of each team’s respective record, playing on the road against a division rival is tough. Things get more complicated when the Colts start resting their starts and backup QB Curtis Painter takes over for Payton Manning. Of course, that’s not official, but they don’t want to be the 2007 Patriots right?

Andrew’s pick – Indianapolis Colts. The Colts won’t bench anyone until they’re safely ahead of the Jags. Of course, that usually doesn’t happen until late in the fourth quarter so maybe the Colts will lose one…

Greg’s Pick – Indianapolis Colts. Are you happy now?! This is the first week I’ll pick them. The Jags just can’t match up against this juggernaut.

Gen’s Pick – Indianapolis Colts. This is the first week that Greg picked the Colts. Watch them lose in dramatic fashion.

Saturday, Dec. 19 8:20 PM:

Dallas Cowboys AT New Orleans Saints – After the Patriots/Saints game a lot of people were already looking ahead to Dallas to be the team to end the Saint’s strive for perfection. The Cowboys have lost the last two game as well as the lead in the NFC East and need a conference win to stay in the play off hunt.

Andrew’s pick – New Orleans Saints. Dallas in December and on the road pretty much spells disaster for them. Darren Sharper is playing too well to let any big plays get past him. If the Saints lose during the regular season, it won’t be at home.

Greg’s Pick – New Orleans Saints. Dallas is just awful in December, I just don’t understand it. They’ll keep this one close, but everything just seems to be falling the Saints’ way this season.

Gen’s Pick – New Orleans Saints. Dallas will live up to its infamous win-less December while the Saints keep marching in. I wish I incorporated that statement in all of my picks….dangit.

Sunday, Dec. 20, 1:00 PM:

New England Patriots AT Buffalo Bills – The New England Patriots are under a lot scrutiny as they slide from the good graces of the ESPN crew. We here at Kibitzers ignore this because criticizing the team that won is like saying the guy who won the lottery should get a minimum wage job so he can still keep it real (look how that worked out for Dave Chappelle). TO may be able to cause some problems for the Patriot’s secondary, but it’s the Bills’ secondary that the Patriots should be worried about. After picking off former Brady back-up Matt Cassel four times, the Bills lead the league with 25 interceptions.

Andrew’s pick – New England Patriots.  Brady threw for 378 yards and two TDs in the first game against the Bills. The Pats definitely have some issues, but not enough to cause them to lose this game.

Greg’s Pick – New England Patriots. Expect Brady to come out gunning deep for Moss – sure one of them might be picked off, but one or two will get through for long passes or touchdowns. Patriots will get their first road win of the season! (minus London)

Gen’s Pick – Buffalo Bills. Sure I’ll go out on a limb here. I’ll probably be wrong but when in Rome.

Arizona Cardinals AT Detroit Lions – Arizona had SEVEN turnovers in their loss last week to the 49ers. Seven! Arizona didn’t even need those other five to lose – Kurt Warner is 0-4 this season when he throws two or more interceptions. Even with 15 players placed on Injured Reserve and Matthew Stafford on the sidelines, the Lions would at least be able to score more than the three points they put up last week.

Andrew’s pick – Arizona Cardinals. Last game was pathetic, luckily they have the Detroit Lions to bounce back against. The Lions have lost at least 10 games for the eighth time in nine seasons and have not had a winning season since 2000 when they finished 9-7.

Greg’s Pick – Arizona Cardinals. There is no way they can have more than 5 turnovers again. If this team expects to make a run into the playoffs again, they better get it together – where better to start than Detroit?

Gen’s Pick – Arizona Cardinals. Come on, against Detroit? This should be a pretty one sided game favoring the Cardinals.

Miami Dolphins AT Tennessee Titans – The Dolphins enter this game tied with the New York Jets for second place in the AFC East, one game behind the 8-5 New England Patriots. The Titans have an extremely slim shot at a wildcard birth but could still salvage the season by winning out. Vince Young is day-to-day, but what does it matter if you’re just handing it off to Chris Johnson.

Andrew’s pick – Tennessee Titans. The Titans have Chris Johnson! To quote Dolphins linebacker Channing Crowder – “He might roll [Usain] Bolt in the 100. Y’all don’t know how fast that boy is. He is fast, fast, fast. Flat-out FAST — capital letters.”

Greg’s Pick – Tennessee Titans. This game should interesting to watch purely because each team really only has one player – Johnson v Williams. Look for lots of running and lots of people being made silly – but the Titans run away with this one.

Gen’s Pick – Tennessee Titans. Watch the Titans’ playbook become “Montezuma’s Revenge” in NFL form – constant runs.

Cleveland Browns AT Kansas City Chiefs – After winning a division game over the defending Superbowl champions the Browns owner Randy Lerner met with Holmgren on Monday and Tuesday to discuss bringing the former Green Bay and Seattle coach out of retirement. That seems kind of odd doesn’t it? These two teams have been outscored by a combined 293 points this season. Matt Cassel hasn’t become the franchise quarterback everyone expected of him when they took him off the incredibly talented Patriots and placed him on the offensively anemic Chiefs. What did you expect!?

Andrew’s pick – Kansas City Chiefs. I really like Joshua Cribbs but if the Chiefs stop him what are the Browns going to do to score?

Greg’s Pick – Cleveland Browns. Yes – put Cribbs as your running back/quarterback for 50% of the plays called! It is clear that no one else on this team can accomplish anything right now. This will be a close game, but Cleveland pulls it out with Quinn’s arm late in the game.

Gen’s Pick – Kansas City Chiefs. I honestly have no idea (or care enough to find out) which teams has more potential to win. So I did what any man my age would do in this situation….Eanie Meany Miney Moe…

Houston Texans AT St. Louis Rams – After losing a couple of frustratingly close games, the Texans took their frustration out on Seattle, and I think they liked it. St. Louis has yet to win at home this season (0-6), but leads this series between the two teams (1-0). Neither team is any position for the playoffs so it might just be better for the Rams to roll over and draft some talent.

Andrew’s pick – Houstan Texans. The Rams are terrible.

Greg’s Pick – Houston Texans. See Andrew.

Gen’s Pick – Houston Texans. Please see above.

Atlanta Falcons AT New York Jets – The Jets did not allow an offensive touchdown and held an opponent to fewer than 200 yards for the fifth time this season last week. The Falcons have lost six of their last eight games and playoff chances are quickly becoming a memory. The Falcons could get a boost if Mark Sanchez is out, but they also have their own injuries to overcome.

Andrew’s pick – New York Jets. The Jets have the number one scoring defense and number one running game in the NFL. You don’t need more than that right?

Greg’s Pick – Atlanta Falcons. The Falcons are on a downward spiral here, but then again, the Jets haven’t been playing too great lately either. They pull this one out thanks to Jets turnovers.

Gen’s Pick – New York Jets. NFL.com says that Matt Ryan is still not participating in practice because of his injury. So let that downward spiral continue Falcons. Jets win this Sunday. (pulls out camera) One, two, three – Saaancheeese!!!

San Francisco 49ers AT Philadelphia Eagles – The Philadelphia Eagles took the lead of the NFC East by sweeping the New York Giants. The 49ers’ forced seven turnovers and scored 24 points off of the Cardinals’ miscues, to keep their rivals from taking the division. There’s not a lot of hope, but it’s there.

Andrew’s pick – Philadelphia Eagles. The Eagles are at home, the 49ers are AWFUL on the road, and in general it’s tough for a West coast team to travel East.

Greg’s Pick – Philadelphia Eagles. Yeah exactly what Andrew said – even if they are fighting for their playoff hopes, the Eagles are too explosive right now.

Gen’s Pick – Philadelphia Eagles. They’re the best in their division and this Sunday, they’ll show everyone why that is – again. Watch Andy Reid, the coach that looks like the mall cop you can outrun, do tricky plays with McNabb and Vicks vapor rub.

Chicago Bears AT Baltimore Ravens – The Baltimore Ravens are coming off a record setting game against… the Lions, while the Bears would just like to stop self destructing at the last-minute. The Ravens are 5-2 at home this season and are trying to keep their playoff hopes afloat.

Andrew’s pick – Baltimore Ravens. Jay Cutler throws interceptions against bad teams, so I expect the Ravens to have at least one in the fourth quarter. If Ed Reed plays, I’m calling a pick six. Heard it here first…

Greg’s Pick – Baltimore Ravens. You can pretty much put this as my lock pick. What happened to the Bears defense?

Gen’s Pick – Baltimore Ravens. I think Ray of Light star, Ray Lewis, has a lot of on-field dancing to do this weekend.

Sunday, Dec. 20, 4:05 PM:

Cincinnati Bengals AT San Diego Chargers – San Diego takes on another crappy division leader, this time at home. The Bengals will clinch the AFC North title with a win, but the last time the Bengals were in California, they lost to Oakland. The Chargers have won an NFL-record 16 consecutive December games and would like to continue to pad this number.

Andrew’s pick – San Diego Chargers. They won’t lose to January. Then they’re out in the first playoff game.

Greg’s Pick – Cincinnati Bengals. The Bengals are out to prove that they belong in the playoffs, and who better to prove it to than the guys who are playing the best AFC football right now? The Bengals will pull out a squeaker in San Diego.

Gen’s Pick – San Diego Chargers. As much as I like to think that the Bengals have made drastic adjustments to their game after last week’s loss, they couldn’t improve enough in a week to beat the playoff bound Chargers. Sorry Ochocinco 😦

Oakland Raiders AT Denver Broncos – Oakland has had good luck bringing down heavily favored teams this year – Eagles, Steelers and Bengals, but not when JaMarcus Russell is playing, so as a safety precaution Tom Cable picked Charlie Frye to start in Denver. The Broncos’ DE Elvis Dumervil leads the league in sacks with 15 and Denver has the league’s second-best pass defense. This will be a tough game for any quarterback.

Andrew’s pick – Denver Broncos. The Broncos beat the Raiders 23-3 last time. I don’t think Mr. Frye will help the Raiders score another 20 in his first start this season.

Greg’s Pick – Denver Broncos. Brandon Marshall. Throw it to him 21 more times.

Gen’s Pick – Denver Broncos. UH OH’S! It says here that Bruce Gradkowski did not participate in practice. Does that mean JaMar-youkidding me? is playing?? RUH ROH indeed Scooby Doo. 

Sunday, Dec. 20, 4:15 PM:

Green Bay Packers AT Pittsburgh Steelers – Green Bay has won five in a row and the Steelers have lost five in row. The Steelers have set the bench mark for the worst collapse in NFL history by a reigning Super Bowl champion (seriously). Big Ben was sacked a season high eight times against the Browns. The Packers defense ranks 9th in points allowed and under 5th in total yards, passing yards, and rushing yards allowed.

Andrew’s pick – Green Bay Packers. I think the Steelers are going to come out playing reallly hard, but it won’t be enough. The Steelers are 4-0 when Troy Polamalu is on the field for at least one quarter and 2-7 when is it out or plays just a few downs.

Greg’s Pick – Green Bay Packers. Polamalu out again?! The Steelers really have nothing to play for, and with the locker room issues and Rodgers running and gunning around on them, look out for this one to be a blow out.

Gen’s Pick – Green Bay Packers. Oh how the mighty have fallen. The Hamburgler and pump faking jamboree won’t be able to pull out a win, despite his best efforts. Bye bye season. They won’t be able to…Steel…a….victory? Ehh??

Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Seattle Seahawks – Jim Mora says he wants to see more “dirtbags” on his team as well as “some nastiness.” The Seahawks offensive line has had to pick Matt Hasselbeck up off the ground more times than not. The Buccaneers passing defense ranks in the top 10 but all other aspects rank in the bottom of the league. Josh Freeman threw another set of picks to keep team out of the end zone for the entire game.

Andrew’s pick – Seattle Seahawks. This game won’t be pretty, but the Seahawks will win because they’re at home.

Greg’s Pick – Seattle Seahawks. Late in the season, away from comfy warm Tampa, the Buccaneers will fall easily to the Seahawks.

Gen’s Pick – Seattle Seahawks. Home field advantage helps right?

Sunday, Dec. 20, 8:20 PM:

Minnesota Vikings AT Carolina Panthers – Well, if you didn’t know any better you would think that the entire starting roster of the Vikings were pro-bowl caliber players. A popularity contest doesn’t guarantee them a win though. The Panthers have allowed an average of just 171.8 passing YPG at home, which could be bad news for Farve, especially if Percy Harvin is still suffering from migraine headaches. The Panthers’ 4th best rush offense will be going against the Vikings 4th best rush defense.

Andrew’s pick – Minnesota Vikings. I think Farve is going to struggle in this game, but not as bad as the Panthers will without Delhomme again. Even though the Panthers held their own for the first half against the Patriots, they eventually broke and lost the game.

Greg’s Pick – Minnesota Vikings. The Panthers just do not have any answer to this Vikings team – who will blow them out – and get Favre some rest.

Gen’s Pick – Minnesota Vikings. When they were promoting this game on NBC, the commercial just talked about the Vikings. They seriously did not say a single thing about the Panthers. I guess by not saying anything, that ‘s actually saying it all?

Monday, Dec. 21, 8:30 PM:

New York Giants AT Washington Redskins – The Redskins are coming of a strong performance on the road and would love to follow it up with a division win at home. The Giants have momentarily fallen out of the playoff picture but a division win will put them right back in it.

Andrew’s pick – Washington Redskins. This is a toss-up for me, I think the Giants always have the Skins number with match ups, but coming off a division loss and playing on the road will be tough for them.

Greg’s Pick – New York Giants. More Redskins at night? You know what that means, a blow out. You’re right Andrew, they do have the Redskins number – and they will continue to have it as they win by 17.

Gen’s Pick – Washington Redskins. Coming off of a dominant win against the Raiders, Washington will use that momentum, at home, to pull out a victory. Plus with Cerrato “resigning” and players being moved to postions where they are more effective, things are a changing in Washington – and for the moment, it looks like for the better.

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2 Responses to “NFL 2009: Week 15 Predictions”

  1. EB December 17, 2009 at 11:09 am #

    This is the worst set of predictions I’ve ever seen.

  2. EB December 17, 2009 at 11:11 am #

    Regarding the New England Patriots, I believe there is such a thing as a “moral defeat,” which is what almost all of their wins have been this year. Except the game against the Saints – that was a “crushing defeat.”

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